There are many things I hate listening to in this world, specifically when I am in public. Three particularly heinous things come to mind: laughter, teenagers, and ringtones.
It’s unreal how mind-bogglingly stupid human beings are and it continues to perplex me that all of these morons can somehow afford smartphones. They either pick the most obnoxious standard ringtones (marimba, alarm, digital, and strum for iphones and that droid ringtone) or they pick one of those overplayed songs that makes you want to club baby seals and is guaranteed to get played at seedy bars in Texas and frat parties.
However, this pales in comparison on the I-will-destroy-you scale with the fact that apparently the simplicity of how a cellphone works is completely lost on every asshole with an iPhone. This is how a cellphone should be used:
In reality there are two things morons with iPhones do when their phone is ringing:
- Stare at their phone like it’s a golden turd for at least three rings and miraculously remember that they have to press a button for the witch magic of a phone call to unfold.
- Look at who is calling, make an obnoxious face so that everyone around them realizes that they are far to important/cool/interesting to be answering this call and just put their phone down. Without doing anything. So that the rest of us have to hear their ringtone for another thirty seconds while they smugly sit there with a shit-eating grin.
NV/R,
Maria
While I strongly approve of the “pretend to ignore for at least 3 rings to see if they go away” technique, it is not something that is permissible to utilize in public. WOOD.
NV/R,
Margo
Yes, cell phones are especially good for dodging people.
and
I have yet to witness a ringtone making someone into a cooler person. But I have seen plenty of totally acceptable strangers instantly lose points when their phones suddenly get Tourette’s.
I have a funny joke for you! Your post just reminded me…ok..here goes:
A baby seal walks into a club