Posts Tagged 'music'
MTV’s “When I Was 17″
Published April 28, 2010 celebrities , television 4 CommentsTags: fashion, MTV, music, pink, celebrities, Rihanna, documentaries, Perez Hilton, American Idol, Kelly Clarkson, Chris Brown, reality television, MTV when I was 17, teenager, Puff Daddy, P Diddy, Diddy, famous people, Gabe Saporta, Kris Allen, Ludacris
My Thoughts On Tattoos
Published March 19, 2010 music , rants 10 CommentsTags: music, tattoo, piercing, tattoos, piercings, body mutilation, Kat Von D, LA Ink
After watching an entire season of LA Ink on Netflix, I have developed some strong opinions on tattoos. I usually don’t waste my time telling the masses this, but take my criticisms/personal opinions with a grain of salt. I have personally been attacked for my own decisions and witnessed people be chewed out over their own piercings or tattoos. While it is exceedingly annoying to listen to ignorant people put in their 2 cents like I could give a rat’s ass, it’s their right to disagree with how you’ve chosen to mutilate (and yes, piercings and tattoos are mutilations) your body.
In my (not so) humble opinion, if you hate someone’s tattoos or piercings, don’t tell them. They will not respect your opinion, especially once they’ve already gone under the needle. You will only alienate them and remind them why they don’t like close-minded, pushy people. Instead, you should
- talk about them behind their back to your friends
- not get a similar tattoo or piercing
- write a passive-aggressive entry about it on your blog that has reached over 100,000 people in less than a year
First off, let’s talk about the point of a tattoo. I can think of only two “reasons” to get a tattoo. First, because it looks cool/beautiful. Second, to remind yourself of something every single day for the rest of your life. Everything else falls under those two categories. If you don’t want permanent ink on your body to remind you of something, it’s only because you want to be cool or you think it’ll be nice to look at.
Having said this, it seems obvious to me that you can accomplish either of these two goals through jewelry or your personal style. Example #1: “I want to remind myself to have faith by tattooing it onto my wrist” (original…) is easily solved by wearing a cross necklace or another piece of jewelry that represents your faith. Example #2: “I want some stars because they’re really cool and super original.” Solution: just kill yourself. Anyone stupid enough to tattoo something as dumb as a star to their body isn’t worth the oxygen they breath. If for some reason you value your (what I’ve already demonstrated to be) worthless life and still are so obsessed with a couple of stars for aesthetic value or nostalgia for some children’s book, buy a necklace/shirt/purse/bracelet/ring/earrings/etc… Don’t worry, you’ll still look incredibly unoriginal and your personality won’t get any better, just as with the tattoo!!
Now for that classic finger-pointing you’ve all been waiting for… I actually have the pleasure misfortune of knowing a “musician” (i.e. little to no musical talent) who decided to get a treble clef and bass clef tattooed to his “bicep” (the douchiest of all douchy tattoo placements). The beautiful part about it is that despite this highly creative homage to music, he couldn’t even get into the music program of a public college… dommage!!
mozart had the exact same thing on his ribs!!!!!
I guess it just goes to show that you can tattoo the word “personality” on someone’s body but it’s not going to give them any…
NV/R,
Maria
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I Hate Rhapsody Commercials
Published January 23, 2010 rants 1 CommentTags: Green Day, Lamb of God, MTV, music, Röyksopp, Rhapsody, Rhapsody commercial, vh1
Not a day goes by without me seeing one of those godawful Rhapsody commercials. First it was the retarded bubble…
Then the [insert douchebag band here] fans get it…
The latest campaign is so mind-numbing that the new commercials are borderline offensive to watch. I know the mass public is stupid (thank you Men In Black), but give them a little credit Rhapsody advertising team! You are not the first people to think of listening to a song as it matches your mood or situation. Moreover, they decided to pair shitty songs with uninteresting situations. The hipster bike rider was bad enough… until we met stoner corner store patron:
Every moment has the perfect song? No shit, Sherlock. How about we give Geico a call and lease the cavemen… at least they listen to Röyksopp instead of Vampire Weekend. Even Flo from Progressive is less irritating than 51 references to Green Day, which is really saying something.
NV/R,
Maria
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“God Hates The World” (that means you!)
Published July 22, 2009 life and death , music , the internet 11 CommentsTags: Barack Obama, canada, choir, christianity, doom, gay, gay marriage, gay rights, George W. Bush, god, God Hates The World, homosexual, Jesus Christ, Martin Luther King Jr., michael jackson, music, music video, Osama Bin Ladin, politics, singing, songs, United States, Westboro Baptist Church, WWJD
I have always been ridiculously interested with extreme stances/people (which is why I’ve seen every documentary on extreme Christians, obesity, drug abuse, and serial killers)… the way people cannot look away from a trainwreck. Which is why I jumped with glee when Westboro Baptist Church released this video…
Alternate video link here, here, and here.
That’s right, you heard it. “God hates the world (that means you) and all her people (and that means you). You lived out your vain lives!” The best part is easily at 4:34 where we have George W. Bush, Larry King, Osama Bin Ladin, and Michael Jackson together (because God hates ‘em!)… oh wait! There’s Martin Luther King Jr. WHAT A JACKASS OF COURSE GOD MUST HATE HIM!
i'd like to see the biblical passage this comes from, please
Most importantly, we must notice what is being held up and waved around in the back of this little choir. A sign saying “The World is Doomed” obviously fits the general tone of the song. And wouldn’t you know that the flag being waved is a Canadian flag!? OF COURSE! Bite your tongue, America’s hat. Maybe God hates YOU, eh?
NV/R,
Maria
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Chris Brown Apologizes to Rihanna
Published July 20, 2009 celebrities , music , news 4 CommentsTags: MTV, youtube, music, Rihanna, Perez Hilton, celebrity, Chris Brown, chris brown apology, court case, media, apologizes, beat, gossip, chris brown rihanna, domestic abuse, domestic violence
In the most public way possible.
Chris Brown, who has not received jail time, just took the COLOSSAL step of apologizing to Youtube’s audience. He never actually specified what he was apologizing for (perhaps beating Rihanna in the face? Just a guess), but he did say that he was very very sorry. Oh good! He also said he’s “told Rihanna countless times” that he’s sorry… perhaps he shouted it from the 150 feet away that he’s required to stay?
What’s truly unbelievable are the comments on the video. One of my favorites probably thinks that all of MTV’s shows are unstaged:
i am glad that you have spoke directly to use and not in a statement
Someone else apparently found all those pictures of Chris with a bloody lip and black eyes…
Rihanna is a jealous stuck up sly bitch and we all kno it was a two way fing so i don’t kno why every1 is takin it all out on you. Your’e true fans will always be by yourside so dont pay attention to the haters!
Of course, some people have limits:
sometimes i guess a bitch just needs to get slapped out… (not bitten though)
Genius here apparently wants a black eye:
this atually made me cry. Christopher…you are a role model no matter what!!!!! what you did everyone forgives and forgets. I was behind you 100% of the way…some people may say they are your biggest fan and blah blah im not going to sit here and say that. because i already know how much i like you and WOULD LOVE TO MEET YOU…
Have fun meeting your role model; remember that broccoli prevents bruising.
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NV/R,
Margo
Heidi & Spencer Make A Music Video
Published July 1, 2009 MTV , music 5 CommentsTags: audrina, Audrina from The Hills, Audrina Patridge, Heidi from The Hills, Heidi Montag, Heidi Pratt, I'm A Celebrity... Get Me Out Of Here, I'm A Celebrity Records, Lauren Conrad, Lauren from The Hlls, MTV, music, music video, Spencer from the hills, Spencer Pratt, The Hills
It is UNREAL how far this has gone…
This masterpiece is actually “Copyright 2009 I’m A Celebrity Records.” Apparently you can just make up fake record labels whenever you want to! My first single, for instance, which will be 4 minutes and 23 seconds of different people pooing (released with the music video, of course) will be “Copyright 2009 Spencer Pratt’s Dignity Records.”
NV/R,
Maria
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Joe Jonas Fights Back!
Published June 11, 2009 celebrities 4 CommentsTags: camilla bell, disney, forever and always, joe jonas, kevin jonas, lines vines and trying times, much better, music, nick jonas, taylor swift, the jonas brothers
Oh, Disney kids and their need for drama.
Let me explain this love quadrangle to you (somewhat). Keep in mind, being over 11 years old, I only know half the names, but… Joe Jonas (the hot one… I guess) went out with AJ (from Aly & AJ, remember them?). Then he went out with Taylor Swift. They had a tearful breakup over the course of a 27-second phone call (according to her), so she wrote a song about him in revenge. HA! Widely publicizing a guy who relies on publicity is definitely the way to go revenge-wise.
Anyhow, Joe then started going out with Camilla Bell, another Disney girl of questionable talent. And in his newest song, he seems keen on getting the message across of who he prefers.
In the song “Much Better” off the current album “Lines, Vines, and Trying Times” (tho I’m not sure what exactly is so trying about being the Most Lusted After by Pre-Teens reigning champ) Joe Jonas is clearly heard saying, “I’m so done with super stars and all the tears on her guitar.” In case you’re in the 3% of people who didn’t know, Taylor’s Swift’s most famous song is called “Teardrops on My Guitar”, and it’s about a boy who doesn’t love her back.
Guess she’s going to be singing that a lot in the next few days. Ouch.
NV/R,
Margo
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“Rapper” Spencer Pratt Releases “I’m A Celebrity”
Published May 21, 2009 MTV , celebrities , music 14 CommentsTags: Heidi Montag, I'm A Celebrity, I'm A Celebrity... Get Me Out Of Here, itunes, MTV, music, rapper Spencer Pratt, speidi, Spencer Pratt, Spencer Pratt music, Spencer Pratt rap, The Hills, vh1, youtube
It’s almost guaranteed that anyone would mention Marshall Mathers aka Eminem as one of the most successful white rappers of all time. It is 100% guaranteed that Spencer Pratt aka The Great White would not make that list.
spencer sneaks into a picture with ya boy
Spencer’s real rapping debut came out this past Monday with his single “I’m A Celebrity,” now available on iTunes. This is clearly a play off of the show Speidi is premiering in next month called “I’m A Celebrity… Get Me Out Of Here.” It’ll be thrilling stuff, and Margo and I are sadistic enough to watch it for you.
Spencer’s rap name is oddly appropriate. I have long since noticed that Spencer’s predator smile made him less than human. Now I see it is because he looks like a great white shark.
So what do you think? Is The Great White the new Eminem? Is he at least more credible than his bleached out wife?
NV/R,
Maria
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Kidz Bop Drops A Bomb: The “F” Bomb
Published May 16, 2009 music 2 CommentsTags: c&d, children, Gavin DeGraw, I Don't Want To Be, kids, Kidz Bop, Kidz Bop 6, mcdonalds, music, overplayed songs, parenting, parents, popular songs, songs
Kidz Bop has been butchering songs for years, from Gwen Stefani (hard to believe her songs could get any worse) to Rihanna. This time, instead of just having horrible pre-pubescent high-pitched little antichrists children change songs to pitches audible only by dogs, there’s a clever new twist.
That’s right, on the Kidz Bop 6 cd being given in Alabama McDonalds Happy Meals (whatever happened to getting crappy little Barbies and cars?), they’ve allegedly dropped the f bomb. On a eye-gaugingly terrible rendition of Gavin DeGraw’s song “I Don’t Want To Be,” many parents (read: PTA-obsessed losers who have nothing better to do) claim to hear the word “fuck.” In some line about chickens and farming (this is Gavin DeGraw, people), the word “looking” sounds suspiciously like “fucking.”
After 2.5 seconds of research, ¿WITP? ascertained this to be untrue. There are a few real issues at play that are not being addressed:
- The Kidz Bop monsters children has inhumanly high voices that can be best described as resembling a dying chihuahua. To expect enunciation from them is absurd. Furthermore, 84% of the original words become completely incomprehensible due to the high-pitched wailing. Conclusion: they are probably not even singing in English, maybe Klingon.
- Parents get absurdly angry when someone other than them curse. This means that it’s okay for little Billy to hear his parents curse at each other, the mailman, the Caps game, Fox News, the person who just cut him off, the refrigerator, the dog, and every other noun in the northern hemisphere. BUT THEY’LL BE DAMNED if he hears it (God forbid) in a song. All that damned Eminem nonsense infiltrating the good ol’ days (when Elvis pissed off their parents by gyrating his hips). If you don’t want your kid to ever hear anything bad, then keep him in a cage in the backyard where he will have zero human interaction and die a virgin.
- These parents are getting angry about a Happy Meal toy. Like it’ll ruin their kid’s entire future to not get a Happy Meal toy. Never mind that they are taking their kid to McDonalds for breakfast, lunch, dinner, second dinner, midnight snack, and Sunday brunch. The real issue is the toy he gets with his cancer meal Happy Meal. Obvious solutions are: a) don’t go to McDonalds, b) ask for a different toy or no toy, c) birth control.
Well Gavin, I’m tired of looking ’round rooms wondering what I gotta do, too. It’s the Kidz Bop kids that are tired of “fucking ’round!”
NV/R,
Maria
iTunes Store, Worse Than Being Rick-Rolled
Published May 12, 2009 apple , music 8 CommentsTags: 3oh!3, albums, apple, Beautiful, Beyonce, Black Eyed Peas, Boom Boom Pow, cds, Daughtry, Day 'n Nite, Don't Trust Me, Eminem, Fergie, Flo Rida, Halo, I Know You Want Me, iPod, itunes, Jonas Brothers, Lady Cudi, lady gaga, music, No Surprise, Paranoid, Pitbull, poker face, singles, Sugar, will.i.am, Wynter
Occasionally I hate my life enough to click on “iTunes Store” to try and find the latest single stuck in my head. This tends to happen when I am completely destitute and cannot afford to pay someone to just shoot me. Instead, I figure I’ll listen to the 30 seconds iTunes grants me once or twice and decide whether it’s worth the legality, simplicity, and steep cost of 99¢. Then something like this pops up:
What is happening to the world when the “Top Songs” are advertised as including Black Eyed Peas, Lady Gaga, 3OH!3, and Pitbull. There has clearly been a little too much drinking over at Apple because the people they hire to figure out what to force-feed into our iPods advertise pull this kind of crap. I can definitively say that few of the above artists have a shred of talent or appeal to anyone with half a brain, or more importantly, half an ear. Beyonce and maybe Daughtry aside, this list is either washed up, utterly ridiculous, or both.
Black Eyed Peas? Really? Isn’t Fergie dead yet? Seriously… we decided many years ago that Fergie was musically and physically unappealing. Then will.i.am is such a self-righteous hack that he rode the coat-tails of the Obama train to receive credibility from WASPs. And the other two aren’t even worth being able to recognize (or ever come out with a worthwhile solo album). I refuse to believe that this world sucks so much that “Boom Boom Pow” could possibly be #1.
Pitbull is just too ugly to want to search for. The same obviously goes for Lady GaGa and Flo Rida. A news flash to all the hipsters: 3OH!3 is OLD NEWS and we all hated them two years ago! Way to be on the cutting edge of the scene, suckas. This leads me to believe that the iTunes Store has not only lost its credibility, but become obsolete.
Suspicions confirmed, the top album is GREEN DAY?????
NV/R,
Maria
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