Posts Tagged 'Perez Hilton'
MTV’s “When I Was 17″
Published April 28, 2010 celebrities , television 4 CommentsTags: fashion, MTV, music, pink, celebrities, Rihanna, documentaries, Perez Hilton, American Idol, Kelly Clarkson, Chris Brown, reality television, MTV when I was 17, teenager, Puff Daddy, P Diddy, Diddy, famous people, Gabe Saporta, Kris Allen, Ludacris
Chris Brown Apologizes to Rihanna
Published July 20, 2009 celebrities , music , news 4 CommentsTags: MTV, youtube, music, Rihanna, Perez Hilton, celebrity, Chris Brown, chris brown apology, court case, media, apologizes, beat, gossip, chris brown rihanna, domestic abuse, domestic violence
In the most public way possible.
Chris Brown, who has not received jail time, just took the COLOSSAL step of apologizing to Youtube’s audience. He never actually specified what he was apologizing for (perhaps beating Rihanna in the face? Just a guess), but he did say that he was very very sorry. Oh good! He also said he’s “told Rihanna countless times” that he’s sorry… perhaps he shouted it from the 150 feet away that he’s required to stay?
What’s truly unbelievable are the comments on the video. One of my favorites probably thinks that all of MTV’s shows are unstaged:
i am glad that you have spoke directly to use and not in a statement
Someone else apparently found all those pictures of Chris with a bloody lip and black eyes…
Rihanna is a jealous stuck up sly bitch and we all kno it was a two way fing so i don’t kno why every1 is takin it all out on you. Your’e true fans will always be by yourside so dont pay attention to the haters!
Of course, some people have limits:
sometimes i guess a bitch just needs to get slapped out… (not bitten though)
Genius here apparently wants a black eye:
this atually made me cry. Christopher…you are a role model no matter what!!!!! what you did everyone forgives and forgets. I was behind you 100% of the way…some people may say they are your biggest fan and blah blah im not going to sit here and say that. because i already know how much i like you and WOULD LOVE TO MEET YOU…
Have fun meeting your role model; remember that broccoli prevents bruising.
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NV/R,
Margo
GYT
Published July 15, 2009 MTV , rants 4 CommentsTags: 16 & Pregnant, ads, commercials, Farrah 16&Pregnant, gyt, MTV, mtv 16 & pregnant, Perez Hilton, Soulja Boy, stds, true life, Whitney 16 & Pregnant
MTV always has some annoying preachy commercials running that try to be hip/rad/totally hot dude. (Remember Pink and the movement to get young’uns to vote?) Unfortunately, by virtue of being preachy, MTV fails at being much of anything except irritating.
The GYT commercials stole in quietly and over time, I became more curious as to what exactly was going on (sort of like getting an STD…?). There would be these black backgrounds with rapidly changing words in bright colors, and then at the end it said GYT in huge letters.
Ruining my merriment
What could GYT mean?! I asked.
For a long time, I simply dreamed. Maybe it was an underground political campaign (underground? on MTV? perhaps not my brightest thought). Maybe it stood for Gorge Your Turkey (it’s never too early for an AMURICAN holiday like Thanksgiving). Maybe there was going to be a new edition of True Life (much like that blessing of our time, 16 & Pregnant).
Alas, it was not to be. Finally I either actually watched the commercial or looked it up, and discovered the ugly truth: MTV was blighting my TV-watching time with STD commercials.
Of course, Soulja Boy and Perez Hilton lend credibility to any cause:
Isn’t this what those stupid Trojan commercials with gonnorhea gifting were for? We get it; STDs are bad; don’t re-gift. Fine. But inundating us with messages about getting a swab shoved up you-know-where is interfering with my blithe enjoyment of trash TV and making me angry.
The real tragedy of STDs is that apparently they make you illiterate.
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NV/R,
Margo
Mia Carruthers, Life After Taking the Stage
Published May 10, 2009 MTV , music , television 26 CommentsTags: MTV, music, taking the stage, reality show, Jasmine Taking the Stage, Tyler Taking the Stage, Aaron Taking the Stage, Mia Taking the Stage, Malik Taking the Stage, Shaakira Taking the Stage, Mia Carruthers, myspace, Perez Hilton, Oprah, reality television, youtube. jonah hill, Breathe You In, Mia Carruthers myspace, Tyler Taking the Stage myspace
Mia “Ima Steal Your Boo BEYOTCH” Carruthers has taken the world by storm with her mediocre guitar hero skills and off-pitch voice. Since the finale of Taking The Stage season 1, every teeny bopper has been asking…
- Are Mia & Tyler together!?
- Omg where can I listen to Mia’s shitty single!?
- WILL MIA’S FAMILY BE ABLE TO AFFORD THE LIPOSUCTION?
¿WITP? has you covered, stalkers and haters. Through a minimal amount of Google/Myspace skills, we have uncovered all the secrets of this orca whale.
1. Are Mia & Tyler together
Wow, are you really this naive? Of course they’re not together!! Let’s review:
If this perfectly adequate proof doesn’t satisfy you, a minimal amount of stalking reveals two things: Tyler does NOT appear on Mia’s “Top 8″ and (you guessed it) Mia isn’t on Tyler’s “Top 22.” Guess who IS? None other than Jasmine (3rd), JJ, and Malik!! Since we live in the 21st century, we can basically derive 100% factual information from Myspace. If we can do it, so can you!
2. Mia’s Musical Career
Sorry folks, hate to disappoint – it doesn’t exist. In order to have a career, you need to have talent, good looks, charisma… in short, redeeming qualities that make up for the fact that you’re an asshole. Mia sadly lacks every quality that could be described as remotely redeeming, but is still a boyfriend-stealing fattie. Regardless, you can check out her personal myspace account for some music. Also, YouTube never fails us. Here is the single from the show (Breathe You In):
To be honest, not a terrible song. Lyrically meh… but she does some interesting key changes. By she I mean the guitar, since she – and by this I mean her voice – cannot hit 50% of the notes she attempts.
3. Mia’s Fat-Removal-Surgeries
Trust us, we are all for liposuction when necessary (Oprah, Perez Hilton, and Jonah Hill to name a few). All we can say is congratulations Mia! Either you got the fat sucked out or finally found a damn good camera angle for your new myspace picture:
Someone has got to give Lindsay Lohan some of the fat from Mia’s chin!!
In conclusion, Mia Carruthers has gone on from her one season of “stardom” to suck in every way possible. She looks terrible, she’s a sad excuse of a musician, her flirting makes us want to gag, and we’d donate money to buy her a stylist.
NV/R,
Maria
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Naked Rihanna – No Shirt, No Shoes, No Talent! (SFW)
Published May 9, 2009 celebrities , music 15 CommentsTags: celebrities, celebrity, Chris Brown, Eurythmics, hollywood, naked pictures, nsfw, nude pictures, Perez, Perez Hilton, Pussycat Dolls, Rihanna
Wow Perez, really out-assholed yourself this time. Rihanna (former girlfriend/abusee of Chris “Ima Beat You Up BEYOTCH” Brown) is in the spotlight again (thanks to Perez) – NAKED. Sifting through the pictures at first seems pretty tame (I don’t see a huge difference between celebs in underwear and celebs in bikinis).
Then all the sudden it’s like being Rihanna’s mirror straight out of a Pussycat Dolls video!? We’re talking full-frontal, extremely explicit, inappropriate snapshots. Wow Rihanna… all that incredible PR/sympathy you’ve been rolling in the past months down the drain.
The truth is that Rihanna has been swimming in controversy instead of talent from the beginning. First we thought she was a man (“thought” like I don’t think that anymore…) and then of course the Chris Brown fiasco. Now this? I’ll be the first to say that I hate Rihanna’s music. SOS, please someone help me… words straight from God. Her songs are more mentally and physically debilitating than Chris Brown’s left hook. Paired with looking like a dying ostrich stuck in a Eurythmics music video and you’ve got Grade A Hollywood Trainwreck.
NV/R,
Maria
Study Says Creature With Giant Wings Maybe Couldn’t Fly
Published April 30, 2009 news , science 3 CommentsTags: birds, dinosaurs, flying, penguin, Perez Hilton, pterosaur, science, scientists
The pterosaur was supposed to be only slightly smaller than Heidi Montag’s music career (okay, maybe a little bigger), weighing over 500 pounds and having a wingspan the size of a schoolbus.
Since it’s slightly weird to think about something that big flying, scientists have decided to go the Occam’s Razor route on us and decide that it didn’t.
That would be great and real logical if this thing didn’t have wings that take up roughly 80% of its body. So maybe it… swam instead? That was the theory offered up by one of the geniuses who worked on this “study”. So glad our tax dollars are at work debating things like this! Now, it’s true that some birds swim, but if you’ve ever actually seen a penguin or an ostrich you realize that their wings make up about 5% of their body. A penguin trying to fly with its thin little wings would be like a whale trying to use a parachute.
In fact, even the scientist who came up with that brilliant idea admitted it seemed unlikely given that the pterosaur’s wings are totally unsuited for anything but, say, flying. His next project is determining if Matthew McConaughey – with his amazing ability to sound like he’s always chewing gum – has the most annoying voice in existence.
But the scientists insist that the pterosaur could not fly in current Earth circumstances. Well, let’s see. Millions of years ago the whole of Earth felt like Africa mid-August throughout the year, and all the continents were stuck together like college freshmen and Aristocrat. Could it possibly be that the environment was slightly different back in the day?
This is by far the stupidest study I have ever heard of. God forbid we research ways to treat cancer – it’s way more important to decide for sure if an extinct creature with gigantic wings did in fact fly.
NV/R,
Margo
“My Penis” by Perez Hilton & THE ANTICHRIST
Published April 26, 2009 celebrities , music , the internet 9 CommentsTags: cat, dog, gay, music, music video, My Penis, Perez, Perez Hilton, youtube
Satan has taken things too far with this whale “celebrity gossiper” this time. Perez’s latest infliction on society (specifically on YouTube) is a “music video” (though calling it that MAY be offensive to musicians worldwide) entitled “My Penis.” Basically, if you didn’t already know that tubby was the biggest fagatron known to humanity, you deserve cruel and unusual punishment – watching this video for over 3 minutes. Perez, who is depicted as skinny (false) and not completely unattractive (false) dances while some DJ (I believe this is Satan’s human form) spins cupcakes that spell P-E-N-I-S. Later we get this montage of dogs and cats (probably some sort of highly artistic symbolism of the war in Iraq or gay-rights activism.) The best part is probably Perez’s penis/bazooka gun which shoots out streamers – INGENIOUS! Nobody has EVER put a big gun in front of their crotch and pretended that their penis was more than the 4″ that it actually is! A+ Perez!!
At this point you’ve probably watched somewhere between 10 and 45 seconds of that video before your day was completely and utterly ruined. Me? I lasted 38 seconds!!
NV/R,
Maria
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